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Sacred Kin Samhain: A spiritual Retreat for Gay & Bi Men
Explore the intersection of spirituality and queer identity. Make new friends. Open your heart and create a deeper connection with other men in a beautiful and safe space. Honor those who have gone before.
Sacred Kin Samhain is a 3-day spiritual retreat for gay and bisexual men. Join us October 27, 2023 - Oct 29, 2023 at Oakwood Retreat Center in Selma, Indiana, for a unique experience that will transform how you view the gay community and yourself.
This is the Retreat for you If:
- You felt out of place or that you didn’t belong in queer spaces.
- You compared yourself in a negative way to other gay or bisexual men.
- You felt uncomfortable in your body around other gay or bisexual men.
- You wished you had other gay or bisexual male friends but didn’t know where or how to start.
- You thought that the gay community was unfriendly or “too bitchy”.
- You wanted to explore alternate styles of spirituality that embraced all parts of who you are (including the queer parts).
- You wanted to feel connected to other men, but social conditioning prevented you from trying.
You're not alone. A lot of gay and bisexual men have a difficult time finding their place in queer spaces or connecting with other men. Men, as a whole, in our society are conditioned from a young age to close off their heart. Queer culture also has some traditions such as "shade" that can sometimes go too far and be hurtful.
At a Sacred Kin Retreat, we enter into the space together under an explicit set of agreements. When you attend you agree:
- to leave the bar attitudes and posturing at the door.
- to be considerate in your speech and take a moment to think how your words will be received.
- to attempt to see the whole person which is often a welcome reprieve from a culture that often focuses on the physical attributes.
- to allow yourself to be vulnerable (as much as it feels safe to be) and to engage with the other attendees and the activities.
- to approach the unique retreat experience with an open mind.
- to be willing to step out of your comfort zone.
These agreements remove many of the barriers that often separate men. Through this, we co-create an environment where magic and connection can thrive.
During this retreat, you will experience a safe place to open your heart, be vulnerable, make new friends, and connect with a greater sense of belonging and connection.
Opening Your Heart
You’ll come away from this retreat feeling more open in your heart. When you open your heart to others, you open your heart to yourself. Discovering that you have more in common with the gay and bi men around you helps you feel safe in queer spaces. As your heart opens, you find more love and compassion for yourself.
Exploring Queer Spirituality
You’ll come away from this retreat having explored different paths of spirituality that embrace all of who you are, even the queer part. Through meditation, movement, dancing, drumming, singing, storytelling, and ritual, you will discover many ways gay and bi men can find wisdom and peace.
New Sense of Belonging
You’ll leave the retreat with a sense of belonging to something bigger than yourself. You’ll no longer think of your fellow retreat attendees as a group of gay guys but rather as a family of friends. It’s not unusual for solid and long-lasting friendships to be forged during the retreat.
Connection to History
As part of our time together, we'll explore our queer history and stories. We'll take time to honor and show gratitude to those queer pioneers who made living out and proud today possible for us. You'll feel more connected and more a part of the story of our queer ancestors.
Why "Sacred Kin"?
It's common that people describe the people that they feel most comfortable around as their "tribe". While "tribe" describes the feeling of connection that the queer community needs, as non-indigenous people, it feels like an appropriation. The definition of "kin" is one's family and relations. This feels like an appropriate way to describe the brotherhood of queer men that we seek to create though these retreats. It's also particularly relevant as many queer people face rejection from their biological families and instead create "chosen families" of their nearest and dearest friends. The goal of the Sacred Kinship program and the Sacred Kin retreats is to give gay and bi men the tools to develop the intimacy and connection needed to create strong, loving communities with other gay and bi men. In other words, these retreats provide the opportunity and space to rediscover and reconnect with our gay and bi kin.
What Happens at A Sacred Kin Retreat?
Each retreat is unique based on the interests and needs of the participants. As Samhain is a time to connect with those who have passed beyond, our retreat will emphasize experiences that allow us to honor our queer ancestors and to feel connected to our lost loved ones. Below are some of the things planned and some examples of activities from other retreats. This list is not final and may or may not include items described below.
In addition to the following, the retreat will include workshops on the Sacred Kin process of intimacy and community building.
Utisetta
Utisetta is a Norse tradition of sitting outside to commune with the spirits of you ancestors, and similar to a vision quest.
Gentle Yin Yoga
Yin Yoga is a gentle movement practice which uses props to support the body and allow gravity to gently stretch the body. It is paired with meditation.
Hekate Ritual
As the goddess of transitions and the in-between, Hekate speaks to many queer people. The Hekate ritual is a simple ritual honoring her.
Goddess Kirtan
Kirtan is a devotional practice of playing instruments, dancing, chanting and singing to the Goddess while making offerings to her.
Drum & Fire Circle
Drumming and dancing around a bonfire is a wonderful way to ecstatically express what is felt in the heart.
Heart Circle
The heart circle involves sharing our stories as queer people in a supportive space without judgment or expectation.
About Me
I'm Julian Crosson-Hill, ACC. I'm an ICF-certified spiritual life & business coach, human design specialist, ritualist, and spiritual guide. I'm also a gay man who once allowed other people to steal his magic. But I learned how powerful it is to live fully as my unique and wonderful self. Today, I help gay and bisexual men embrace who they are and live it.
I started the Sacred Kin retreats because I know how powerful it can be when gay and bi men come together without the expectations and judgments that they've been told to have. I co-founded the Between the Worlds Men's Gathering with my good friend, Michael Llyod. We co-facilitated it from 2002-2010.
At Between the Worlds, men came together with the intention to open their hearts and deeply connect with one another. It was a magical experience and created many new and lasting friendships. I still have friends to this day that I made at the event. Facilitating the magical process of people coming together in community is one of my passions.
Will you join me?
About Oakwood Retreat Center
Oakwood Retreat Center is a retreat center in Selma, In. They have been hosting retreats for 21 years. The center features several meeting places, hiking trails including a path that ends at the White River. You can learn more about the site and find directions at their website.
Site Amenities
Registration
Payment plans are available.
We offer a payment plan for all registrations with NO additional fees or charges. Simply add your registrations to your cart and at checkout choose "partial.ly". You may choose how much to put down (10% minimum) and how often to make payments. The full balance must be paid by October 20, 2023. Don't wait! The earlier you commit, the more time you'll have to pay, and the smaller payments will be.
Registration closes Friday, October 20, 2023 at midnight.
Registration includes your lodging at Oakwood Retreat Center for 2 nights and 6 meals (dinner Friday, breakfast, lunch, and dinner Saturday, breakfast and lunch Sunday). You may choose vegetarian or vegan meals.
The shared room ticket provides you with your own bed in a room shared with others. A private room ticket will give you your own room. Bathrooms are shared.
Snacks will be available. Each guest area includes a coffee/tea center and a refrigerator. If you wish to bring soda or other beverages, you may keep them cool in the fridge.
If you are attending with a spouse or partner and wish to share a bed, please indicate so we can assign rooms properly. Please provide this info even if you are booking a private room.
Rooms include bedding and towel.
FAQ
Sacred Kin Samhain is open to anyone 18 years of age or older who identifies as a gay or bisexual man. Please note, that the only requirement is that you identify as a gay or bisexual man. Yes, trans men are absolutely welcome!
Oakwood Retreat Center will provide bedding and towels for your stay. You may wish to bring your own pillow if that will make your more comfortable. Bring comfortable clothing and shoes. If you will be participating in Utisetta, bring a mat or blanket to lie on and warm clothes. We also recommend a yoga mat, if you have. You may also want to bring a mug or water bottle, a journal and something to write with, and any drums or musical instruments. Bring items and photos that you'd like to place upon the Queer Ancestor Altar. You will get your items back at the end of the retreat. Bring an open mind, lots of love, and plenty of joy.
Do not bring friends who have not registered, firearms, fireworks, pets, illegal drugs, or alcohol.
No. Oakwood Retreat Center is not clothing optional. We ask that outside of the bathrooms or your sleeping room, all guests remain clothed. We also feel that some people equate nudity with sex. As this is a retreat focused on building connection and community, we want to not encourage the attendance of those who would be looking for something else.
Wonderful! We do make some space for sharing workshops or events presented by the attendees. Please us our contact form to tell us about your idea. We'll get back to you and let you know if we can fit it into this retreat.
We want to make sure all your questions get answered. Please us our contact form to ask your question. We will get you an answer as soon as possible.
Can't make it but want to know about the next one?
Sign up for our email list to be notified of upcoming retreats and events. Providing your state allows us to plan retreats based on proximity to those interested.